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Tag Archives: personal expression

So, You Think You Know Me

I often wonder how you come up with the notion that you know me.  Too many times you have said that I am like this or I am like that.  You are only just seeing me but believe that you know what I am all about.  Let me ask you this:  Where were you:

When:  I was a child of 18 months in the early 1960s and survived an infection of spinal meningitis…at a time when the mortality rate was much higher than today.  Thankfully, I don’t remember it but apparently, I had to learn to walk all over.  To this day, I can’t stand cold showers–I was told that I was placed in ice water to battle the fever.  I have discolored and bad teeth attributed to the antibiotics used.  I was truly blessed.

When:  My parents divorced when I was four;

When:  I met my new older sisters; and subsequently, my younger siblings through the years;

When:  I was 9 or 10 — I was introduced to baseball, and I loved it; I was bitten on the finger by a garden snake while picking berries and suffered from acute appendicitis (not related to snake bite);

When:  I was 11 and 12 — I used to lay in my bed with my transistor radio under my pillow, pretending to be asleep but really listening to the evening baseball games; I dreamed of playing ball like Carl Yastrzemski;  I actually played baseball for a while but life took me in a different direction;

When:  I first kissed a girl — on the lips; my first date; getting my driver license and driving my first car;  and my first pickup truck with 3 on the column — it was missing 2nd gear;

When:  I wrestled, boxed a little and competed in gymnastics for a year;

When:  I enlisted in the Navy and left home;  arriving at boot camp; whoa — major life change!

When:  I arrived at the beach, at sundown, in San Diego, CA, on the 4th of July after driving cross-country to my first duty station;

When:  I flew in a helicopter to an aircraft carrier;  thinking all along there wasn’t enough deck for the helo;

When:  I met and fell in love with my first wife;

When:  I was at sea for months at a time — and later was divorced from my first wife;

When:  Iranian Hostage Crisis;

When: I first used a keypunch machine (1977); a computer (1981); my first microwave oven (1986) right after the shuttle Challenger blew up; my first cell phone (1987); I was studying computer programming; and got my first personal computer (1989);

When:  I visited numerous ports-of-call in many foreign countries being exposed to so many different cultures;

When:  I met my second wife;

When:  I was the third person in the world to hold my new born daughter;

When:  at 18 months old, I rushed my daughter to the hospital because she had eaten her grandmother’s blood pressure pill–I drove on the sidewalk to bypass traffic; and, at her bedside, I prayed all night for her recovery — God blessed us;

When:  I visited my mother, who had terminal cancer a few weeks before she died but because of “military operational commitments,” I could not be there when she passed but my brothers were with her;

When:  Desert Shield and Desert Storm;

When:  I got a second divorce; and lost custody of my daughter;

When: I didn’t get promoted, again — I retired from the Navy after 23 1/2 years’ of service;

When:  A heart arterial catheter angiogram;

When:  I was one of the last people to be with my former mother-in-law when she died — we had a rocky start but after her debilitating stroke, I read the Bible to her and we often prayed together in the last few months of her life;  I held her hand for a couple of hours in the hospital room the day she died–shortly after I left the hospital;

When:  I wandered, apparently aimlessly and selfishly, for several years;  searching for “happiness;”

When:  My first wife found me on the internet and after nearly 20 years we got back together;  we’ve been together for 11 years now.  She says she loves me…personally, I think she tolerates me;   😉

When:  My first granddaughter was born; I think I was about the 5th or 6th person to hold her but I was there when she was born;  there are now four grandchildren, two girls and two boys — the youngest is named after my dad and me;

When: My ex-wife unexpectedly died and I flew 3,000 miles to help comfort my daughter and two oldest grandchildren who knew her;

When:  I or my wife were out of work for extended periods of time; since 2006

When:  My mother-in-law had a stroke and came to live with us so we could help care for her; she is 87 now;

When:  five colonoscopies over the past 20 years;

When:  I draw or  paint pictures; or, (still WIP) writing a couple of books;

When:  After nearly 40 years’ as an administrator, I learned to:  publish ebooks, write a blog and build a solar battery bank by watching YouTube videos; It actually works the way it is supposed to– I’m stoked;

When: after many years of God’s prompting, I finally started ministry studies;  its not easy to find time to study, after working all day, as an olderly guy and still be able to spend quality time with my wife — she’s very understanding;

When:  that little boat has been sitting in my driveway for the past 2 years and hasn’t touched a lake yet, since I’ve had her…

These are snippets of my life — soooooooo much more has made the person I am today.  Yet, you think you know me.  You lie to me and tell lies about me; you steal from me; and, call me names when you think I don’t hear you.  I wonder, what is it really?

I know that you don’t really know me, you couldn’t regardless of how you try to portray yourself, especially at your young ages–remember, I was younger once, too.

God has told us to love one another — he didn’t say, “no matter how difficult your fellow man makes it…”

Matthew 22:35 And one of them, a lawyer, asked him a question to test him. 36 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” 37 And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the great and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

You probably don’t even realize that I pray for you daily but that’s okay.  I pray that God will open your spirit, your heart and your mind to the salvation of Christ Jesus, who paid the ultimate price for all of us; who is the way to eternal life.

No, you don’t know me and I don’t really know you even though I’ve been where your are and I know — for many of us, there is freedom when we surrender to the will of God, in the name of Jesus — His only begotten Son.

 

Jay 🙂

 

 

 

 

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Casser le Jour (Break the Day)

Daylight Savings Time

Through Window Dawn Does Now Break

The Curtains Are Drawn

By Jay LeBorgne

Le temps de l’heure d’été

Par la fenêtre Aube Est-ce que maintenant Pause

Les rideaux sont tirés

 

 
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Posted by on March 15, 2016 in Poetry, Uncategorized

 

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Take My Hand by Jay LeBorgne

Reach out, take my hand
allow me to walk with you
through forests, among trees
stroll along the beach, through life
Sit with me, take my hand
allow me to talk with you
through tough days; good times
listening, hearing, caring
Lay with me, take my hand
allow me to embrace you
share each other
share our love
Reach out, take my hand
allow me to grow old with you
through the rest of our days
together forever and always
Jay LeBorgne
 
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Posted by on March 14, 2016 in relationships, Uncategorized

 

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Reaching Out by R.S. Barrett

I was seeking refuge when I reached out to you,

I wonder if you have any idea how difficult that was to do.

Not because it was your voice I sought,

Not because I should not ought,

This enormous flaw I wear like a shield,

Most often to me misery does yield.

Pride! Lift me up and hold me high,

Let not it be revealed that I hold my strength so nigh,

So that others might somehow see,

That I too have yearning, I ache, I need.

And in my quiet desperation, not knowing,

What seed I’d dropped or what it might be sowing,

You gave to me not what I was hoping for,

But instead you reached back with so much more.

R.S. Barrett

 
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Posted by on March 14, 2016 in searching, Uncategorized

 

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February 29, 2016 #PrayerRequest

February 29, 2016 #PrayerRequest

My fellow Christians and non-believers alike, I have a special prayer request for all who desire the Lord’s hand in our lives daily, throughout our nation and throughout the world as a whole.

So much is going on in this world today from apathy and corruption to hatred, murder and terrorism.  Many of us state that we’re tired of it and we want someone to do something about it.  I agree but I believe that “someone” is each one and all of us.

I believe that we as a nation of peoples and citizens of the world need to take action and conduct a time of adjoined prayer.

I am asking everyone to set aside 9:00 pm (1800) (where ever you happen to be in this world at your 9:00 pm (1800), where many people will be praying at one time for a 24-hour period) for a few minutes of prayer in which, we start with acknowledgement and praise to the Lord, our sovereign God, creator of everything from just His spoken word; let us give thanks to him for His creation and His sacrifice of His Son, Christ Jesus as payment for the sins of all people; thanks to him for His grace and forgiveness for whoever believes in the sacrifice of Jesus, that he died and was resurrected, conquering even death, and that we accept this gift from Him with a humble heart; let us ask for our own forgiveness and for Him to tenderize our hearts to forgive others that we know or believe have done us wrong; let us pray for a resolution and true unity of our families, communities and nations; let us pray for God’s will to be done by all and that He bring us the return of Christ Jesus, Sovereign Ruler, King of Kings and King of Glory sooner rather than later.  Let us pray that He ends the suffering of our children.

You will not be alone–If you are a single person, your prayers will be adjoined by the Holy Spirit to the families, friends, groups and other peoples throughout the world as part of one voice, one prayer to the One True God.

Matthew 18:19 (NIV)

“Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.

I will speak to as many people as I can and pray daily over the next 40 days for the Lord to open the hearts and minds of as many people that are willing.  You are welcome to join me in these daily prayers, as well.

1 Kings 8:28 (NIV)

Yet give attention to your servant’s prayer and his plea for mercy, Lord my God. Hear the cry and the prayer that your servant is praying in your presence this day.

If you are willing, forward, copy and paste, transfer, speak to your family and friends and ask others to join in a worldwide prayer for the defeat over evil in our individual lives so that we may make a true Spiritual difference in our individual worlds.

For those of you who say that you do not believe, now…get a head start while there is still time for there will come a day when:

Philippians 2:9-11 (NIV)

9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name,

10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth,

11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

I make this request in humility as a son of the Living God, in the name of Christ Jesus, our Lord and Savior, Amen.

 

 
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Posted by on January 19, 2016 in Prayer, Uncategorized

 

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We Live in an Ambiguous Society

Disclaimer: The following is an opinion diatribe…read at your own interest.
Wha?

Wha?

If bald is beautiful, why is hair restoration so important?

Vagueness seems to be common place in our society. Why?

Political Correctness, not wanting to hurt others’ feelings, personal and mental sensitivity; not being able to see past one side of a situation or object; or perhaps, we lack the ability to express or describe something for fear of all those things. Moreover, I think the answer is actually within us, personally, because we’re afraid. Yes, afraid of how we will be perceived.

Take the blunt person. How many times have we complained that person is a bully, contrary, argumentative or that they’re just a(n) (smart)ass? We often hear that he or she is just mean, not to mention the vulgarities used to describe them. Do we ever take into consideration of what they are telling us, regardless of how it is delivered?

Then there is the meek person, the person who doesn’t make themselves clear because they are afraid of how they will be perceived. And then, we call them weak, timid, shy and often make fun of them or just dismiss their views altogether.

How about the uninformed person? They speak to be involved even though they do not have a grasp of the facts of a situation, person or object. We are quick to describe them as a village idiot and also ignore them.

The gamers, liars, performers, politicians…just to single out a few, all bring up negative views in our minds but yet, we are reluctant to describe them as they truly are [perceived].

Think about how many times we denounce violent behavior but do nothing to stop it because the solution often requires, yes, violence.  How can we coexist with people who literally want to kill us?

Our personal standards of what is right and wrong, our own filters and barriers, our fears, fears of rejections, retaliation, or of being ostracized, often dictate how we describe the world around us.

I enjoy when people like me but I don’t care if they do. I really mean it. I am somewhat of an extrovert because my life has ran the course from here to there, so many “new” environments and places—personally as well as employment. I wasn’t raised to be meek but I have learned to tone down my bluntness; and I am now more reluctant to fight at the drop of a word—argue maybe but not fight.

In the midst of the destruction of our society, as we have known it, dialogue is so beneficial. However, when one group seems to have all the answers, for everyone regardless of our differences, no matter which side of the situation we are on, we will find the enslaved and oppressed on the other side. I do not say this about a particular group of peoples based on color, ethnicity or religion. I say this based on a free people of this country, the United States of America, which for at least the past decade has been anything but united.

It is ideology that is changing our way of life and regardless of the ambiguity of our situation, it appears ambivalence is a driving force. One size does not fit all, in spite of what “they” tell us.

No, violence is often not the answer but when survival is at stake, sometime we must defend ourselves. But what will be the reasons behind our fight? Will it be so that we can have more and someone else have less? Will it be so that we can be recognized for ourselves, our individual ways of life(styles)? Will it be for our religious freedoms and whether ours will be the dominate one? Will it be for our children, so that if there is a future, it will be a good and prosperous time for them?

Or, will it be for our freedom? Freedom from tyranny brought on by those that seemingly know what is better for us as a “society” regardless of what is better for us as individuals of a nation.  Regardless of what we really want?

I would hope that we cast our ambivalence aside and make a stand for our individual freedom over a society of leeches. When someone receives, it has to come from somewhere. Are we as a hard-working people going to let them take it (whatever the “it” is) from us without some kind of stand? I would hope not.

Open dialogue is good – intimidation is not. Do not allow yourselves to be intimidated anymore. Speak up before they tell you your speech is no longer free. Don’t be vague, tell us how you really feel about something. Ambiguity may be killing you.

I can’t see the top of my head, in your opinion, am I bald, yet?

Jay 🙂

 

 

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No One Should Be Irreplaceable…

0423152000  It’s a nice, quiet, cool and drizzly Saturday.  A day of coffee and catch-up blog reading.  The satellite radio station seems to know what kind of day it is and the music is appropriate.

Angela came in to see if Stacey left a key…no, even though he’s been in the past two days. It did give us a chance to chat about how are faith strengthens our respective relationships and how nice it is to be back with the love of our lives; and how happy God has made us in spite of ourselves.

A rental from a guy with stuffed wild turkeys that he personally killed. Apparently, his wife does not have the same appreciation as he does for the finer things…just wait until he gets the coyotes back from the taxidermist. Better go ahead and rent a larger unit now.

Rental trucks coming and going.

A relatively calm work day in the self-storage environment after such a busy week.

I went through a dozen or so resumes in hopes of finding just the right person. I found three. I interviewed one. She, I think, will be perfect for the assistant position. It amazes me how some people can almost beg for a job and then not show up for the interview—without a call to say they won’t be showing up. I have a feeling there’s a reason they were unemployed. It is alright, I got the cream.  Alas, I can’t start her until sometime next week because the VP who is in charge of the next stage of hiring is on vacation until Monday. Shouldn’t someone else be able and/or authorized to do this in his absence? No One Should Be Irreplaceable…

This past week was public sale week for those who haven’t paid their storage rent in a few months. One hates to do it but, it’s all part of the business. Unanswered legal letters, phone calls, messages, voicemails…sold!

Next week should be more fun as soon as the young lady starts training – I like training. I often feel like a potter taking raw clay and forming a new pot or figurine. It really isn’t about me, though. It is about another chapter, with a new character.

Twenty days to go until my long weekend of time with my wife and friends; and fishing…and relaxation.

Jay  🙂

So, last night before bed my wife presented the profoundly daunting question, “If right is right, why would anyone go left?” I had no argument there. 😉

 

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My Sanctuary

There's no place like home

There’s no place like home

I enjoy people in the real world; I enjoy the customer service aspect of my job as I also enjoy karaoke.  But when I am home with my wife and the furry kids, I so enjoy my privacy.

Oh how I enjoy my privacy.  Thankfully, soon the leaves on the trees will be full enough to where the neighbors can’t see me and I won’t be able to see them.

The daffodils have departed, the tulips are on their way out; azaleas and dogwoods in bloom as I await the irises and the peonies.  The birds feeding — the blue birds in their houses and soon the return of humming birds and butterflies.

An April rainy day, a cup of coffee and the love of my life…God has blessed me, the sinner, in spite of myself.

My God-given sanctuary in a city neighborhood.

Jay 🙂

 

 
1 Comment

Posted by on April 16, 2015 in home, perspective, sanctuary, spring, Uncategorized, weather

 

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It’s Time To Move On…

No, this is not a solemn occasion, this is reality.

It was another great busy day.  The furry kids didn’t climb all over me yesterday morning; my wife breezed through on her way out the door and kissed me goodbye and wished me a happy birthday; bible study, a nice fresh cup of joe, and off to work I went.  That’s when things got busy.

Of course it was the last day of the work month and everyone calling to make their payments, rentals, inquiries, some additional things with my boss in town because of the snow we had the day before which postponed events; and end of month reports.  The drive home was nice, I got to talk to my dad but missed a call from my daughter–it was really nice that she texted (I hope that is a word) me a really cool special birthday e-card.

Furry kids, my honey, mom-in-law, pizza, cards in the mail and then, for desert mind you 😉 my wife made this way cool chocolate cake, dark chocolate icing with chocolate chips inside the icing and, if that’s enough, raspberry filling — oh yeah.  And my wife was concerned it didn’t come out right and I wouldn’t like it — ha ha!  I win again.  She’s so good to me.

Later, I got calls from one of my cousins and one of my brothers to catch up — we do that for our birthdays; and many birthday wishes on various social media, thank you all.

My dad sent me a package.  In it were some items that had belonged to his mother, some important papers that had belonged to him that are now belong to me; and, much to my surprise, papers concerning me that he had kept for all these years–high school report cards, middle school report cards, letters, poems and stories I had written and forgotten existed, childhood immunizations, letters the Navy wrote to my dad to let him know that ownership had changed from him to me, papers that went back to the beginning, a copy of my birth certificate.  In essence, my paper childhood.  It was an interesting trip back in time — some things came back to me.  And while on that trip down memory lane, I realized, if I had not before, birthdays are reminders that it’s time to move on.  Not in the sense that you forget your childhood, youth and younger years but move on in the sense that we don’t stay back there.  Live today and look forward to tomorrow because yesterday is done…it had its time and that’s why we have memories.  Dad always knows…

And, to add to the goodbye of my younger years, I had a moment to say goodbye to Leonard Nimoy, a man who entertained me most of my life.  A man I knew from childhood as Mr. Spock.  A man who took me on impossible missions and in search of interesting things.  I pray that his search is over and he rests forever in peace in the glory of the Lord.

My time is short today, my honey is out with her mom and the guys are here to build the closet but the furry kids are relaxed,

Before I go, I think I’ll have another piece of cake and a cup of coffee.  Let me eat cake…I’ll move on with my life just a little later.

I am truly thankful for my life…Thank you, God.

Jay 🙂

 

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The Bull’s Eye of Life (Update)

Currently available for free #Kindle download.  Get yours today.  Read it and review it.

http://www.amazon.com/Bulls-Eye-Life-L-J-LeBorgne-ebook/dp/B00O8DZX3Y/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1417541204&sr=8-3&keywords=the+bull%27s+eye+of+life

 

 
 

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